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Showing posts from September, 2023

On Anxiety Disorder

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I've had a pretty serious problem with anxiety for as long as I remember. Sometimes, when the panic flames up, it feels like I'm going to burst into flames. This poem came out of that feeling. Spontaneous Human Combustion   a human body catching fire without an apparent external source of ignition When my first fire flared crimson,   doctors diagnosed delirium: a phantom flame that burned harshly but did not mark me, not externally.  Dismissed as yet another  hysterical teenage girl, hungry  for attention. My chaos made them nervous like I was doing it on purpose.  So, they stuck the ashes back together  with shame and Sellotape, thinking they could squeeze the fire out of me. And I learnt to burn silently.  Stomach somersaulting, head clouded  with the shock of smoke,  I stepped on hot coals so often,  I stopped smelling the burnt flesh.  It happens when I least expect…  the crisp crack of splitting skin. Spitting sp...